【愚人节英文恶搞短信】
preacher: why? what did he do to you?
神父：为什麽?他对你做了什麽吗?
girl: he touched my breast.
女孩：他……他摸我的胸部
preacher: you mean like this? (the guy did it.)
神父：你是说像这样子吗?(神父伸手摸女孩的胸部)
girl: (a little shy from the touch) yes.
女孩：(因为神父的举动而有一些害羞)嗯……是的
preacher: that“s no reason to call him that.
神父：只是这样子的话你没有理由骂他啊
girl: but he also took off my cloth.
女孩：但是……他又把我的衣服脱掉……
preacher: you mean like this? (he did it again.)
神父：你是说像这样子吗?(神父动手脱掉女孩的衣服)
girl: yes, that“s what he did.
女孩：是的，是这样子没错
preacher: that“s still no reason to call him that.
神父：可是这样子你还是没有理由骂他啊
girl: and he put his you-know-what into my you-know-what...
女孩：然後……他把他的……那个……放到我的……那个……里面……
preacher: (evil laugh...) you mean like this? (and you-know-what)
神父：(奸笑貌)你是说像这样子吗?(神父和女孩就那个那个了)
girl: (after a few minutes...) ugh... yeah, that“s what he did...
女孩：(数分钟後)喔……是的……就是这样子………
preacher: my dear girl, that“s still no reason to call him a...
神父：我亲爱的孩子，就算是这样你还是没有理由骂他「你这个………」
如果你长得难看，请打110;如果你身材不好，请打120;如果你脾气不好，请打119;如果你觉得自己漂亮，请打我手机，详谈……
Because you, I believe in fate, perhaps all this are doomed to heaven, having a Mianmianzhizhong traction. Now I want to say is that I Shangbeizi--what is built Nie ah? !
因为你，我相信命运的安排，也许这一切都是上天注定，冥冥之中牵引着我俩。现在的我想说的是——我上辈子是造了什么孽啊?!
Also known as the bricks and mortar boards infants bricks, the old Beijing is the most characteristic of the cultural heritage of one of a lethal strong, and easy-to-carry concealed, not weapons, and other characteristics--shoot you use the most appropriate!
砖头又称板儿砖，是老北京最有特点的文化遗产之一，具有杀伤力强，易于携带隐蔽性高，不算凶器等多种特点，所以——拍你用它最合适!
Psychological test: If you and the coward race, you want to: 1 you run fast; as fast; you coward slower than… answer: you than beasts also a beast; you are beasts; beast than you! Happy April Fool's Day!
心理测试：如果你和狗熊赛跑，你希望：1你跑得快;2一样快;3你比狗熊慢。答案：1你比禽兽还禽兽;2你就是禽兽;3你禽兽不如!愚人节快乐!
In my eyes, you will always be looked carefree, and eating with relish is always, sleep is always Hanran sleep…… I really envy you know, Oh! Sometimes think, as you do so pigs are very good!
在我眼里，你看上去永远是无忧无虑，吃饭永远是津津有味，睡觉永远是酣然入睡……我真羡慕你呀，唉!有时候想想，像你那样做头猪也挺好的!
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